I’m an American and nothing is my fault — it’s yours, or my parents’, or the government. In fact, the only thing I’ve every taken responsibility for is my fat, lazy ass. Well, it looks like I’m off the hook there too! It really is my parents’ fault:
A gene that contributes to obesity has been identified for the first time, promising to explain why some people easily put on weight while others with similar lifestyles stay slim.
People who inherit one version of the gene rather than another are 70 per cent more likely to be obese, British scientists have discovered. [...]
The findings provide the first robust link between a common gene and obesity, and could eventually lead to new ways of tackling one of the most significant causes of ill health in the developed world.
I knew that the twinkies, Big Macs, and margirine had nothing to do with my ass. I generally don’t trust the British, but their scientists aren’t that bad — they did invent America after all. Besides, anything that takes the blame off of me is okay. I wonder who’s responsible then for my kids being such fuck ups. Maybe it’s the television, or that hippity hop music…