Tories Killing Climate and Democracy

A frustrated, defeated Layton.

On Tuesday, Conservative senators killed Bill C-311, the NDP’s Climate Change Accountability Act, which was passed by a majority in the House a Commons.

You care because the bill was killed before it could go to the Senate Committee for debate by unelected senators in a snap vote while 15 elected Liberal senators were absent. I care because this is only the first time that unelected Conservative senators will use their near-majority to kill a bill passed by our elected representative.

Security, Drinking Water, and Men in Shorts

So far, the G8/G20 cost Canadian taxpayers $857 Million, with $675 Million spent on security, and the they’re still not done adding up the tab.

Credit: Jeremy Gilbert

You care because your tax dollars were spent on security for world leaders who were discussing how much to charge you for clean drinking water. I care because while you can put a price on clean drinking water, seeing that many grown, uniformed men in shorts and riot gear is, well, priceless.

Source: Lex Gill

2 Years With No Chance of Parole

So they’ve done it again. The Americans have put the Republicans back in charge of Congress. And why? Because they’re mad at the Democrats for not having been able to clean up a mess that the Republicans made.

Source: CNN

It’s like a cruel joke that a bunch of beautiful, hormone addled  co-eds would play on that fat girl from the mid-West who always talks about her mother in the first person. You know, the one that likes to whisper and blush to her roommate about the schoolgirl crush she has on the extreme frisbee player who lives down the hall. The whole fucking thing is stupid, juvenile, and probably going to scar a lot of innocent, helpless folks for the rest of their meager lives.

It took the Republicans and their benefactors nearly a decade to stuff the economy down the drain pipe, and Obama has only had 2 years to try to pull it back out again. I mean, the man has already become first Black man in the White House! How much more can you expect from him? Especially in only 2 years. He has some some pretty damn big shoes to fill as it is. And you know what they say about a man with big shoes…

What do you want him to do next? Walk on water? I mean, Jesus, he’s the first Black president of the United States of America, not Jesus of Nazareth. And even if he was, what good would that do? Jesus might’ve been a miracle worker, and what he did with some bread and fish was impressive, but a lot of good that would’ve done for the credit crisis or unemployment rate.

But really, it’s all seems a bit too convenient to be coincidental. I mean, after Dubya, the GOP knew that the party was over (at least for the moment), so why not let someone else clean up the mess? And when the stains and cigarette burns wouldn’t come out of the carpets and furniture, they’d be there to help pick out new ones.

It kinda remind me of what Chretien did to Martin. Martin spent years trying to oust Chretien. In the end, Chretien managed to hold on to the reigns of the Liberal Party and ended up retiring on his own terms, letting Martin take control of the party with no real contest.

But what what Martin inherited was a sponsorship scandal that had happened on his watch as Finance Minister. He tried claiming that he hadn’t know about it, but the damage was done. Either he was a liar, or he was an inept jackass who was unfit to run the country. The party’s image was ruined and Martin’s career along with it.

But hey, politics is a cutthroat business, so you have to watch yourself when you’re shaving. You think you’re doing something that’s going to make you look good, clean cut, and trustworthy, but you come out looking like a pirate with more scars than war stories, and no one trusts a record with that many omissions.

I mean, for everything that can be said about the strategic genius and tact of Dr. James Carville, he’s just one man. There are hundreds of cutthroat rogues with only half of the talent of Carville swelling the ranks of the GOP, but when you add them all, the Dems are out-manned and out-gunned.

But hey, the problem with the GOP is the same problem with the profession of policing. The sobering reality of it all is that we need police and we need conservative (if only to balance out the left-wing wing-nuts that would have us living on communes and growing cilantro) — liberal democracy just wouldn’t work otherwise.

The tragic reality, however, is that the kind of person attracted to those jobs are the wrong kind of person for those jobs. Both professions seem to attract a disproportionate amount of hate-mongers, tyrants, and douche-bag jocks with small penis complexes and nothing else to do with themselves ever since they graduate high school and had football season confined to the boob-tube.

That being said, it’s kind of hard to ignore that the GOP does seem to be a lot better at the long-term game than the Dems. It seems like every time the history books turn around, the Dems are reacting to some mess, movement, or crisis that has roots somewhere deep in the Good Ol’ Party’s legacy.

Mind you, even that’s probably because of the GOP’s incestuous gene pool. I mean, if they really are attracting a disproportionate number of hate-mongers, tyrants, and douche-bag jocks with penis envy, that’s gotta make it that much easier to arrive at a consensus and build strategy in general.

Gawd, I’m starting to wonder if maybe I’m the mad one for having some semblance of hope or even speaking up in the first place.

John Stewart is Smarter than Lou Dobbs

Or at least he’ll make you smarter than Lou Dobbs will. Wonkette reports on a new survey by the Pew Research Center:

People who regularly watch The Daily Show and The Colbert Report could correctly answer more political trivia questions than those who watch CNN or Fox News or especially the teevee network news — those people were only barely cognizant of their own arms.

I wonder how YouTubers compare to primetimers — they have to be cognizant of their own arms right down to their fingertips.

Congress Gets Presidential Recognition

In a landmark statement, US Fuhrer President George W. Bush has recognized the constitutional authority of Congress. The Washington Post reports:

Asked at a recent news conference about congressional war powers, Bush seemed to suggest that while he disagrees with efforts to set a timetable for withdrawal, lawmakers are within their constitutional rights to do so.

I remember what it was like to have constitutional rights. In those days, election votes were counted, and leaders were, well, elected. At the rate that Georgie’s going, we just might have ourselves an ol’fashioned ballot jamboree. Maybe I should rinse out my bathtub and get a batch of moonshine going. The last time we had one of those, Jeb ran out of hooch, and we all had to pile into the Chevy for a ride over to the Levy, but the Levy was dry…

The Belle Tolls for Thee…

Today, Pop on the Pop had the scoop on how Britney went shopping in LA. God, can you even call that a scoop? No fault of your own, Joy. It’s not your fault that this is what God’s greatest democracy cares about.

Hm, it’s funny how when things are going well, we find solace in spending money that most people could survive on for a month have on shit we don’t need. Things haven’t been going well for this Southern Belle, you know. It’s not her fault, though. Nothing in America is your own fault. It’s your parents’ fault or, failing that, society’s. It’s kind of like the proof for God that way: circular. I wonder how that’s going to work out for her children. In any case, the bell is tolling for this Belle. It’s just too bad that she can’t hear the fat lady singing over her own voice — something else that’s a lot like the proof for God.

Mexican Border Standoff

Oh, I get it: it’s Washington’s fault that those wetbacks are such a slippery bunch. MSNB reports:

EL PASO, Texas – For all the tough talk out of Washington on immigration, illegal immigrants caught along the Mexican border have almost no reason to fear they will be prosecuted.

Ninety-eight percent of those arrested between Oct. 1, 2000, and Sept. 30, 2005, were never prosecuted for illegally entering the country, according to an Associated Press analysis of federal data. Those 5.2 million immigrants were simply escorted back across the Rio Grande and turned loose. Many presumably tried to slip into the U.S. again.

Now, it might be a bit of a problem finding room for 5.2 million new inmates in our already over-crowded prisons, but we can always put them to work building new ones. Of course, then they’ll be stealing jobs from you and me.

What’s a xenophobic, fascist police state to do? I mean, what’s this country coming to when you can’t lock people up without putting decent, honest, hard-working American out of work.

Via Scandal Times.

Another B-Rate Presidential Hopeful

It doesn’t really surprise me that Hollywood is thought of as liberal. After all, if you’re going to whore around Tinsel Town snorting cocaine off of other people’s body parts, the last thing you need is a conservative writing laws or enforcing them. Besides, with the paparazzi hiding in your bushes, watching your every move, you don’t need Big Brother breathing down your neck too.

What does surprise me is that whenever an actor goes into politics, they seem to jump on the GOP bandwagon. The Politico explains:

Fred Thompson, the “Law & Order” actor and former senator from Tennessee, has moved beyond pondering a bid for the White House and begun assembling the nucleus of a campaign should he decide to run, according to people involved in the effort.

Thompson has not yet decided to seek the Republican presidential nomination. But “he is getting more serious every day,” said an adviser familiar with Thompson’s plans.
If Thompson runs, he’s likely to stress his willingness to take on the biggest issues, including nuclear proliferation and the entitlement crisis, advisers said. “People are disappointed that for the last two presidencies – almost 20 years now – we’ve seen people not held accountable and a cavalier attitude toward basic governmental responsibilities,” said the person who has talked to Thompson.

Maybe the Law & Order role went to his head. Maybe never being recognized in your favorite restaurant will drive you to the end of the political spectrum that induces you to meddle in the politics of piss-poor Central American countries. Or maybe there’s just something irrestible about leveraging what is undoubtedly the most sought after kind of recognition in this country to try and gain some actual power. Hm, I wonder if this means that Tila Tequila has a shot at becoming the second female President?

Probably not. If assholes like this really had any of that celebrity recognition that was worth leveraging, they wouldn’t have to run for office. Mind you, that doesn’t really explain the Governator — but who really can explain the motivations of anyone who is descended from Nazi war criminals and got their big break prancing around in a Spedo?